there is a way in which my eyes see every moment

There is a tea shop,

in an old building, with a hand-plastered tile floor.

Small cream and yellow squares break off every day under sock-clad feet.

Umbrellas litter the floor on rainy days, but no one trips.

I sit, drinking a tea like soil,

as the leaves stir in my memory.

My bare feet are rooted on the tile floor while also walking the smooth floor of a temple.

I close my dueling eyes like fluttering wings

to become only this.

My body is in the tea shop, sipping, but only the building is a brick portal,

while I am only a feeling.

I have often found,

in the way my eyes blink nervously, and then flutter open again,

that the faces around me have changed.

I am at a sunny picnic day that is familiar like a memory, but it hasn’t happened yet. The landscape is familiar, as is the house, but I have never been there. Yellow flowers…

Later, breathing deep breaths beneath my breath, beneath the warm breezes outside the shop, as I look at city lights just to be, to just be, without the pressure to create, achieve, and impress,

I think about and wonder when will I ever find myself in this ocean.

I  wear a maroon hoodie with arms crossed, strands of hair across my face.

Today, and on days when the smoky sun begins to collapse all around me I am like, “maybe tomorrow I’ll be satisfied.”

My body is a tea pot,

and every morning, I throw the covers off of me, and I throw off the lid of this tea pot, because I am not done yet,

only misplaced.